Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
