the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize