Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
