She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
