Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize