You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
