If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Randomize
