I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
