Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
