I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
