apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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