i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize