you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
