he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
