so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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