No, you can still breathe under the balls.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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