help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize