How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
