AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
