you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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