If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
its liver damage thursday
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize