Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
