So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Randomize
