you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
