Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
