dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I lost the right to judge tonight
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
