no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
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