yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
