I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
