alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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