I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
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