yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize