it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I forget how to act sober
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
