you turned your livingroom into a bong?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
