Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Randomize
