dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
operation have a gay friend backfired
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
