5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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