As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I have aggressive nipples.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize