so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
We talked him into tasing himself.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
