i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
