YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize