everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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