So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
