Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
