White coat. Heels.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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