how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
