it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize