im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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