He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize
