high people should be assigned attendants
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
